Tired: Let People Enjoy Things. Wired: Let People Be Haters. Inspired: Let People Be Critics and Analysts!
(A very loose riff on a recurring social media theme)
Very often, especially on the internet, it is easy to come across situations wherein a person shares, for example, that “such-and-such movie has some reactionary implications” (in whatever combination of words). The replies to such a post are often far more inflammatory than the original opinion shared, and the original poster will very likely be inundated with these replies. It’s clear, if you scroll through enough of these, that many of these people are sincerely offended by someone critiquing (from a place of good faith and even serious analysis) a movie they happen to enjoy. They aren’t actually reading and comprehending the original post as it’s written. Instead, “such-and-such movie is kind of reactionary” is translated, in the other person’s mind, as “such and such movie is reactionary and since YOU didn’t notice that it was that means YOU are and i’m JUDGING YOU SO HARD FOR IT”.
Do you notice yourself doing this sometimes? If so, pause! Look at how many assumptions you’re making. Did you put words in the other person’s mouth? Did you extrapolate the situation out a little too far based on speculation and maybe your own feelings of insecurity and uncomfortableness?
Here’s an idea: sit with that uncomfortableness. Ask yourself some questions about it if/when you have the time! ~unpack it~. How specifically are you uncomfortable? Do you feel defensive? Afraid? Anxious? Frustrated? How strong are those feelings? Or, to attack this from another angle, how would you feel if you were talking to a friend who enjoyed a film that seemed to clearly have misogynist currents in it (for example), and you wanted to talk about that part of things (even if you liked some of the movie yourself!), and in response your friend just flipped their shit on you instead? Wouldn’t that suck?
Imagine being able to talk about the less-than-savory parts of media you enjoy! Imagine being able to think about those parts ALONGSIDE the parts you like! Imagine finding it interesting instead of an immediate attack! Imagine realizing that you can enjoy and talk about a piece of media so much more deeply when you can see the good AND the bad and the WHY’S of both (and how they might interact)! It can be cool and good I promise. It’s like thinking something’s a mirror and realizing it’s actually a diamond or some other literally multi-faceted reflecting object.
Speaking of good and bad — precious gemstones! They’re beautiful and cool! Honestly fascinating when you think about how they’re formed in nature! And often mined with slave labor or with workers being paid very poorly working in very bad conditions. — But what if we could change that someday? And THAT is one of the good parts of thinking about the bad parts of a thing!
[PS: in the US at least (because i can speak from experience) this also happens literally with the United States as a concept. “oh you hate america? you hate americans! you hate ME!” and its like no i hate capitalism and settler colonialism and slavery and apartheid and racism and genocide actually. but obviously this means that this mindset — of fiercely attaching one’s identity to the thing one consumes, of consumption as identity and identity as consumption — is something amerikkkan hegemony fosters very intentionally (even if not directly/totally overtly all the time, obviously. that’s what hegemony is for!).
PPS: Being ignorant about a less savory facet of something you like doesn’t make you stupid or bad or a supporter of whatever that less savory facet is. You simply didn’t know. And now you do! Simple as.]
